future is not what we think it is

Now the no-exam graduation students registration is almost done and the decision that who goes to which school has also decided. Although I have the chance to choose to go to another school other than BJTU, I have never thought that I have the ability to go to cas or even BeiHang, I even have never thought that I am one of the students who have that chance. And the fact is that cas refused me finally.

At the very beginning I have agreed with Mr. Lin that I was going to stay at BJTU. That made me have a thought that breaking the promise is not appropriate.

But when I saw my classmates were busy contacting the schools, I also want to have a try at that time. If I can be accepted by cas, my father maybe will be very happy. So I send a resume to cas. But finally I can’t achieve this.

I am not good at speaking, never, and also have few planning of myself. I think that my classmates have the clear thoughts of their future life, and also mature plans. But I am not capable to be one like them.

When I came from cas, I sent a message to her, which was the message I sent months later after last one, it was her birthday. And she replied "Thank you!". That is all between us. Maybe we are just friends even since the first year when we are in this university, but why I can’t accept this fact.